futile devices

2012-02-12T11:41:00.000-08:00

"perfectenschlag" -dwight schrute

2012-02-11T21:27:00.000-08:00

Bailey:

just be like hahaha

but not just haha

you gotta add the extra ha

Bailey: hahaha

me: im so confused

hahahah

Bailey: hahahaha

well ok

hahaha

is better

than haha

haha is just like

w/e

hahaha is like you're actually laughing

okay then

lala

2012-02-11T14:24:00.000-08:00

happy weekend! im currently drinking the best oolong tea ever.

my beloved pups, molly and max

his seat of choice

also... i am extremely grateful that this stage of my life is over. good-bye lsat books!

funny

2012-02-09T07:28:00.000-08:00

it's funny how things work out. literally JUST 2 days ago, i was thinking about how much i missed the idea of "studying," and how much i yearned to hole myself up in coffee shops and libraries to study again. then ONE day ago (yesterday), i got into law school!

i am extremely grateful and count this blessing as a pure testament to God's amazing mercy and constant provision in my life. i've been beyond "lucky" in a lot of areas of my life, with respect to not only law school related things, but in everything. God has carried me through series of trials and has provided so many people along the way to love me and encourage me and remind me that beyond my career aspirations, i am his daughter first and foremost. they have reminded me that rather than fixating my attention on what i don't have, i should focus on how periods of "waiting" can refine my character and grow me in my walk with God. i'm thankful for all the brothers and sisters in my life who have been praying for me and encouraging me since my lsat taking days, and i am especially grateful for my mom who has really been the only person to see me in my struggles during this whole transition from being a college student to becoming a working person to becoming a law school student. needless to say, those transitions weren't always easy, and i am entirely indebted to all of you wonderful people who have cared for me and demonstrated so much patience with me.

i'll unveil where i am going to law school after i hear back from another 3 schools. i expect to figure things out my march.

xo.

2012-02-05T16:01:00.000-08:00

princess of china - coldplay & rihanna

(note: i just realized that lyrics to this song are kinda emo. you should disregard that and listen to the song for its melody. it's pretty experimental in comparison to the stuff that coldplay usually produces..)

-----

btw. i am still in shock that it's FEBRUARY already! i'll be 22 soon, which isn't that significant of a number by any means, but still... it's crazy how time flies. O___O anyway, crossing fingers for a relatively smooth work week!

this is pretty awesome

2012-02-04T20:08:00.000-08:00

not that i am having a bad day (i mean come on, it's saturday!), but i thought this post was freaking ingenious. will definitely store it in the back of my mind for crappy days that may take place in the future!

via wit + delight. the post is entitled, 'how to throw a proper pity party.' awesome, right!?

"people i have met, and how they have proceeded to disappoint me." hahahah, that's pretty great.

hmm these actually look like items that a girl might turn to when she's on her period. it's no surprise that usually the crappiest of days take place during that uncomfortable and emotionally hellish week -- i mean, that IS a heat pad up there, isn't it? anyway, the coffee ice cream looks really good.

in fact, i am now craving java chip/almond mocha fudge/coffee ice cream!

errands {this weekend}

2012-02-03T06:35:00.000-08:00

- cut my hair, or "trim" it for those who think that i should keep my hair relatively long. i've been debating this for like half a year!!! but it's time to do it. washing my hair takes too long and requires too much shampoo..
- try to upgrade my phone if i'm eligible to do so. i'm not crazy about paying $400 for a new iphone, in fact i think that's an enormous rip-off. i need to figure out if i can just pay the $99 or whatever it is..?
- apparently i have a scheduled session with a personal trainer at the gym that i go to. this will probably be an extremely futile meeting because i have no upper body strength and he will probably ask me to do pushups/lift things. which is annoying. i hate doing that stuff, it makes me feel like a really pathetic girl, haha. oh well, maybe he'll tell me what my body fat percentage is! i've always wanted to find out. that's kinda cool.
- go to the doctor. might get a blood test done to see if my health is up and running. gosh it better be, i'm not even 22 yet! have to "report" this to my dad who is eagerly anticipating my health results. he always thinks that i am sick or something

also, i want to make these almond custard buns. they look so yummy. (via here)

yes.

2012-01-31T19:19:00.001-08:00

Source: lottaagaton.blogspot.com via Emily on Pinterest

we heart ryan gosling

2012-01-31T15:41:00.001-08:00

Karen:

UGH WHAT A SEXYSNUGMUFFIN

Sent at 3:32 PM on Tuesday

me: hahahah

Karen: but honeslty

if i met him in person

i think i would just like spaz

actually i spaz in reg life anyway

me: omg ahahha

sexysnugmuffin

you need to coin that term..

Karen: yea b/c

e/o uses STUD muffin

but i'd love to just spoon w/ him

and snuggle

he looks like a good one

me: LOL

Sent at 3:38 PM on Tuesday

me: yeah he seems like a nice guy

Karen: that breaks up fights

wearing tank tops

loll

2012-01-30T19:28:00.000-08:00

oh, with half of my heart

this is a sweet post.

snapshots

2012-01-29T12:01:00.000-08:00

love waking up to this little monstergot these chocolate marshmellows from alcove cafe+bakery with karen yesterday.
i LOVE lamill coffee. can't wait for my next visit!

want

2012-01-28T12:36:00.000-08:00

pedro garcia...

why
must
you
make
such
beautiful
(and overpriced)
shoes...

haha i tried on these shoes at nordstrom last weekend. i fell in love and then was heartbroken after staring at the mirror of my feet donning such beautiful shoes for a good 20 minutes. whhhhyyy must they have that minimal and neutral, earthy tone appeal that i love? oh well, life goes on! just thought i'd share :)

getting ready for brunch + bikram yoga with karen!

sunset

2012-01-27T19:28:00.000-08:00

thought the view looked rather pretty from work earlier this evening...

hello random thoughts

2012-01-25T07:54:00.000-08:00

i'm a pretty random person. i have eclectic interests and can find myself at least semi-interested in most things that people decide to talk about, whether it be politics, celebrity gossip, paula dean, crafts, shopping for vacuum cleaners, or cilantro. see? anyway, here are some random thoughts that have been buzzing in my brain recently.

1. songs that keep looping in my head: pumped up kicks and love you like a love song. my maturity has probably regressed by a couple years just by the ridiculous number of times that i have listened to love you like a love song (by selena gomez. miss teeny bopper/justin bieber's girflriend). yeah oh well, can't help that it's still so catchy after 50+ times of listening to it.....back-to-back...

2. sometimes i have these moments where when i am under intense stress, i think about how all that pent up anxiety generates grey/white strands of hair. because the thought of that freaks me out, i proactively choose to think about other pleasant thoughts, thereby alleviating my stress. you should try it sometime! it's not the thought of having white hair due to old age that freaks me out so much as it is how anxiety alone can degenerate and age your body in such a noticeably adverse way. crazy huh?

3. i am super! excited to get my new macbook pro this week. needless to say, my everyday technological companions have been failing me as of late - my macbook is SO slow. it takes like 5 minutes for me to input my password and another 5 minutes for anything to appear on the screen. the rainbow circle of death accompanies pretty much every application i ever use or open nowadays, and yeah.... it's time to lay it to rest (or give it to my mom, but i doubt even she would want to receive this "generous" donation). anyhow, as much as hate this computer, it's also served as a pretty awesome repository of memories created during my college years. but alas, the college years are pretty much behind me and the future/changes are a-comin' so i might as well update my gadgets! speaking of which...

4. my iphone 3GS is also super failing. but i won't complain about it like a total brat until our contract is up for renewal... cuz at least it still functions as a phone. plus, i don't want to mar my blog with a bunch of blatantly first world problems.

5. it's almost february! that's kinda exciting, because it means that it's semi-almost march, which means that i SHOULD hopefully hear back from schools with at least a couple of definitive answers (crossing fingers!). the sooner i get a definitive answer, the sooner i can plan for some major traveling that i plan to do this summer :) so far, i'm thinking of traveling to europe for a couple weeks and perhaps spending some time in nyc with my sister. :) 2 weeks here, 2 weeks there, ahhhh sounds like bliss! and so far away...

that concludes my random thoughts for the day!

monday

2012-01-23T07:51:00.000-08:00

i love waking up to the sound of rain... and emails containing youtube videos. my friend allen had emailed me yesterday night with the following youtube video:

is that really how ALL Asian moms are? i thought only chinese moms were like this. "why you so dark?!""go put some pants on!""eat more!""there are starving children in africa!"yup definitely have gotten those before. but thank GOD my mom has never worn one of those tacky visors. i could never stand or trust in the safety of asian women drivers wearing those ridiculous hats. anyway, happy Monday! :)

happy chinese new year

2012-01-22T15:45:00.000-08:00

ringing in the new year with the starchy goodness that is 年糕! (shown above)i think i just realized why it's called nian gao. nian means sticky and is a homonym for year. gao means paste and is a homonym for high. so nian gao =, which is "sticky paste" is also "high year." chinese people sure love their puns!

me and les dogs

2012-01-21T17:10:00.001-08:00

2012-01-20T22:44:00.000-08:00

slow days

2012-01-19T09:36:00.000-08:00

"I believe in eternal security. God keeps me secure by making me desperate to be kept--through prayer and the fight of faith." - John Piper (via Joshua Harris)

ps. saw this today and it made chuckle chuckle (via cup of jo). definitely true to some extent!

good read

2012-01-16T10:11:00.000-08:00

Christ the Pure Redeemer, Christ the Dirty Whore

from Beneath the Cross by James Pruch

Humans are naturally bent toward works righteousness. We think that if we do good, God will think we are good. When it comes to Bible reading, we often moralize passages of Scripture, asking, “What does this passage have to do to me?” and “What is God requiring of me in this passage?” Those questions aren’t irrelevant, they just aren’t the most relevant. Instead, we should ask, “How does this passage point me to the person and work of Jesus Christ?” and “How does that truth draw me to love, worship, and desire him above all else?”

Christians are not ignorant of the fact that the story of Hosea and his adulterous wife points to Jesus and his Bride, the church. The story of Hosea’s marriage to Gomer climaxes in Hosea 3. Here’s the whole chapter:

1 And the LORD said to me, “Go again, love a woman who is loved by another man and is an adulteress, even as the LORD loves the children of Israel, though they turn to other gods and love cakes of raisins.” 2 So I bought her for fifteen shekels of silver and a homer and a lethech of barley. 3 And I said to her, “You must dwell as mine for many days. You shall not play the whore, or belong to another man; so will I also be to you.” 4 For the children of Israel shall dwell many days without king or prince, without sacrifice or pillar, without ephod or household gods. 5 Afterward the children of Israel shall return and seek the LORD their God, and David their king, and they shall come in fear to the LORD and to his goodness in the latter days

Here Hosea is told by God to redeem (literally “buy back”) his wife who is now up for sale in the slave market after “play[ing] the whore.” I carefully ask you to picture a naked slave woman with smeared make-up and bloody joints, ashamed and weeping, standing on a stage with a man standing beside her asking, “Let’s start the bidding at…” Now imagine silence. No one wants her. From what I have researched, 15 shekels was not much money. Maybe ten bucks. Hosea paid $10 for his wife.

In verse 4, God tells Hosea why he is supposed to do this: God’s people will live without their true Husband (the LORD) for a long time, but then they will return to seek him and “David their king.” “David” is another name for the Messiah, who is Jesus Christ.

It is easy to see that Hosea serves as a type of Christ. He prefigures Jesus, who will be the ultimate Redeemer of God’s people. He will buy back a people who are unwanted and unloved. He will purchase them from spiritual adultery, from forsaking their true Husband for lesser husbands who cannot satisfy. Jesus though, unlike Hosea, paid an infinite cost to redeem his people. He shed his blood and died to bring God’s people to himself.

In this story, we often miss that Gomer is also a type of Christ. You might think I’m walking a fine line, but hold on before you cry foul. Jesus never committed spiritual adultery against the Father or physical adultery in his life on earth. He was not a sinner. But how did Jesus buy back God’s people? It wasn’t by living a good life and then going back to the Father. It was through substitution. Jesus became Gomer. Jesus, like Gomer, was raised up on a stage–the center stage. He was naked, bleeding, mocked, and rejected. No one wanted him. He was actually sold for 30 pieces of silver by one of his best friends. His Father even turned his back on him when he was on stage.

Jesus took Gomer’s place, and our place, as the one despised and rejected by men. He bore our griefs, carried our sorrows, and was pierced for our transgressions. He was guilty of no sin, but on the cross, God made Jesus to be sin for us so that we might become the righteousness of God (see 2 Cor. 5:21). We were cursed, just like Gomer, yet Christ “redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us” (Gal. 3:13). He became the cursed, dirty whore that we might be accepted, redeemed, and pure.

Amazingly, Christ can be both Hosea and Gomer in one person. Hallelujah, what a Savior!

2012-01-13T21:31:00.000-08:00

baby, i fell asleep beneath the flowers for a couple of hours, on a beautiful day

south pas

my dogs make awesome footrests :)

i just noticed that my flip flop tan has completely faded! i guess that's what happens when you leave san diego..

2012-01-08T17:44:00.000-08:00

very grateful for a weekend well-spent in torrance. but oh my goodness, i am SO TIRED.

gotta recharge my body for not only another work week, but also next weekend. must regain the energy needed to go skiing (or perhaps learning how to snowboard?) in big bear!

picture of an amazing powdered blueberry donut that i had this weekend from king's hawaiian. soooo good! :)

2012-01-06T20:29:00.000-08:00

(via this blog)

things on my mind

2012-01-05T19:17:00.000-08:00

1. a bubble bath
2. maybe this skirt
3. spring 2012
4. pinkberry
5. big bear

aches and appreciation

2012-01-03T18:41:00.000-08:00

i came home today completely, completely fried and exhausted. usually i come home mentally exhausted, but generally collected and all in one piece. i'll eat dinner, i'll do the dishes, i'll maybe hang out with a friend, i'll chat with people, i'll watch tv and THEN i'll call it a day. however, today was way different because i came home, and the first thing that i did was collapse--collapse out of pure exhaustion and collapse out of what is most likely my contracting of a nasty cold or flu. those things just ALWAYS spring up on you when you least expect it!

even though i'm all wearied out, i feel like today is one of those days that i can genuinely appreciate working moms. honestly, i don't know how all the professional moms out there can manage to do a good job at work and do a good job at home! can you imagine coming home with a migrane or splitting headache (like i did today) and greeting either crazy hyper kids or moody and angsty teenagers or worse yet, an incessantly crying and pooping infant!?!!!! plus, food to cook, dishes to wash, a husband to attend to, kids to read bedtime stories to, and oh! work to return to--uhhhhh the very next day. it sounds like so much pressure and i have no idea how my mom did it. all this doesn't even factor in stuff like looking presentable and making sure that you yourself are a happy and healthy camper.

all i can say is, thank you mommy... and every other hardworking mother out there! your job is not easy but i consider your job the most dignified and purposeful.

just a side note: i think women are worked to the bone even more than they were before the feminist movement arose. i mean, honestly... thank you simone de beauvoir and every other feminazi out there who wanted women to be treated in exactly the same way as men are and for freaking FAILING to take into consideration that the responsibilities of a woman are pretty darn painful. it seems to me like the world is pretty okay with assigning men's traditional responsibilities to women and expecting women to perfectly juggle those burdens with the inherent burdens of being a female. another reason why feminism is so flawed and misguided... it's actually generally made things worse for our gender.

happy '12

2012-01-02T12:49:00.000-08:00

it still blows my mind that the holiday season is officially over! but here's to a new year of new starts and new beginnings.

i rang in the new year this year in san diego! spent the weekend watching movies (5 movies, no less..), eating sushi, making tea station runs, and piecing together a folksy 1000-piece puzzle while sipping on champagne.

random

2011-12-27T18:59:00.000-08:00

so i was thinking about my favorite foods today...

non-sweet foods: NIU RUO MIEN (chinese/taiwanese beef noodle soup), suan la tang (chinese sour and spicy soup), pai gu fan (chinese/taiwanese pork chop and rice), dan dan mien (szechwan style), tofu, seared tuna, raw fish, chong yu bing (green scallion bread), cucumber, white and red cabbage, beansprouts, alfalfa sprouts, salmon, seaweed, veal, dry turkey breast, turkey jook (porridge), tofu skin, kimchi jjigae, korean seafood pancakes, mcdonald's french fries, chic-fil-a waffle fries, chic-fil-a chicken tenders, hard-boiled egg whites, wheat thins, hot cheetos (they seriously KILL my stomach though)

sweet foods: jiu niang (sweet rice wine soup), champagne, sprinkle's marshmallow cupcakes, dark chocolate and almonds/hazelnuts, apple flavored sour punch straws, jasmine green milk tea preferable from tea station (but i guess half-n-half is okay too), ai-yu and grass jelly

2011-12-27T17:19:00.000-08:00

december 13, 2011.

2011-12-26T16:27:00.000-08:00

hope everyone had a wonderful holiday! i'm stuffed to the brim (still), but am looking forward to night of catching up with old friends from san diego and berkeley. some images from Christmas day (the first image is my favorite for some reason).

2011-12-23T08:53:00.000-08:00

2011 was a year of epic proportions. it was the 10 year anniversary marker of the sept. 11th attacks and it was the year that saw the death of some of the world's most heinous and murderous individuals - osama bin laden, qaddafi, and kim jong il. we sympathized with japan as the country experienced a wave of catastrophic earthquakes and tsunamis, and shook our fists at our u.s politicians who just couldn't (and still can't) seem to get their act together to recover our economic mess. there were many controversial scandals, trials, and protests... which just all seemed to point at humankind's glaring depravity. each day pretty much presented more challenges to global citizens all around the world, as you heard about religious cults who financially robbed their members as they predicted doom's day, mothers who killed their own children, and adults who sexually harassed young children.

i don't expect for 2012 to be a more "peaceful" year by any measure. people will always act out of selfishness and greed and mother nature will always do as she pleases, even if that means taking away your electricity for days and uprooting the tree outside your street to uh, block your street (yup, direct reference to the sg valley). i think all we can do as individuals is be grateful for the people we have in our lives, for the ways that we've been blessed, and to continue to pray for this fallen world while practicing love and patience to everybody.. because truth be told, life is hard for everybody.

well, i guess that's my lackluster equivalent of a speech that the pope would give.. hahaha.

2011-12-20T21:36:00.000-08:00

it is going DOWN tomorrow. stay tuned!

2011-12-18T21:56:00.000-08:00

my mom admitted today that she facebook stalks me and my sister in order to look at our pictures and to see what our friends write on our walls. without any shame whatsoever, she recited some of my more recent facebook statuses which was, needless to say, creepy. although my life is pretty boring/standard and i have nothing scandalous to hide, my personal stance is that parents with children over the age of 21 should be banned from social network media, mainly because not being banned from stalking their own kids is an open entry into micromanaging the lives of their adult kids. i jokingly told my mom that "we aren't going to be friends anymore, mommy." i was only teasing, but honestly... the internet is so frighteningly invasive.

also: i can't stop listening to codes and keys by death cab for cutie. i think the song is some kind of depressing metaphor about ben gibbard and zooey deschanel's then faltering marriage (i think they're now divorced....which makes me depressed, hahah). nevertheless, it holds a really pretty melody, so i've been listening to it non-stop the past couple days.

good night!

oh hello

2011-12-15T20:40:00.000-08:00

morning

my street

a small contribution that i made to my office space! i painted a little ceramic dish at color-me-mine and decided to donate it to my office, namely my desk!

♥

2011-12-14T09:48:00.000-08:00

smoke and mirrors - rjd2
resurrection - temper trap
something good can work - two door cinema club
1901 - phoenix
walking on a dream - empire of the sun

here are two of the songs:
1. smoke and mirrors

2. walking on a dream (the music video is really strange)

interesting article about fetuses

2011-12-11T20:09:00.000-08:00

from cnn:

What it all adds up to is this: much of what a pregnant woman encounters in her daily life -- the air she breathes, the food and drink she consumes, the chemicals she's exposed to, even the emotions she feels -- are shared in some fashion with her fetus. They make up a mix of influences as individual and idiosyncratic as the woman herself. The fetus treats these maternal contributions as information, as what I like to call biological postcards from the world outside.

By attending to such messages, the fetus learns the answers to questions critical to its survival: Will it be born into a world of abundance, or scarcity? Will it be safe and protected, or will it face constant dangers and threats? Will it live a long, fruitful life, or a short, harried one?

The pregnant woman's diet and stress level, in particular, provide important clues to prevailing conditions, a finger lifted to the wind. The resulting tuning and tweaking of the fetus's brain and other organs are part of what give humans their enormous flexibility, their ability to thrive in environments as varied as the snow-swept tundra in Siberia and the golden-grassed savanna in Africa.

The recognition that learning actually begins before birth leads us to a striking new conception of the fetus, the pregnant woman and the relationship between them.

The fetus, we now know, is not an inert blob, but an active and dynamic creature, responding and adapting as it readies itself for life in the particular world it will soon enter. The pregnant woman is neither a passive incubator nor a source of always-imminent harm to her fetus, but a powerful and often positive influence on her child even before it's born. And pregnancy is not a nine-month wait for the big event of birth, but a crucial period unto itself -- "a staging period for well-being and disease in later life," as one scientist puts it.

This crucial period has become a promising new target for prevention, raising hopes of conquering public health scourges like obesity and heart disease by intervening before birth. By "teaching" fetuses the appropriate lessons while they're still in utero, we could potentially end vicious cycles of poverty, infirmity and illness and initiate virtuous cycles of health, strength and stability.

So how can pregnant women communicate to their fetuses what they need to know?

Eat fish, scientists suggest, but make sure it's the low-mercury kind -- the omega-three fatty acids in seafood are associated with higher verbal intelligence and better social skills in school-age children. Exercise: research suggests that fetuses benefit from their mothers' physical activity. Protect yourself from toxins and pollutants, which are linked to birth defects and lowered IQ.

Don't worry too much about stress: research shows that moderate stress during pregnancy is associated with accelerated infant brain development. Seek help if you think you might be suffering from depression: the babies of depressed women are more likely to be born early and at low birth weight, and may be more irritable and have more trouble sleeping. And -- my favorite advice -- eat chocolate: it's associated with a lower risk of the high blood pressure condition known as preeclampsia.

When we hold our babies for the first time, we imagine them clean and new, unmarked by life, when in fact they have already been shaped by the world, and by us. It's my privilege to share with the TED audience the good news about how we can teach our children well from the very beginning. -- Annie Murphy Paul

2011-12-10T23:17:00.001-08:00

be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.

-plato

an explosion of pictures

2011-12-10T15:09:00.001-08:00

i finally got around to uploading a truckload of random pictures.

first off, i present jackie! the cutest half-korean baby i've ever met. :) she's wearing a little chinese outfit for my grandpa's birthday while fumbling with her daddy's wallet, haha. cutie patootie.

peach bread things on my grandpa's birthday

fast forward and we're in... taiwan!

my very attractive sister

...and the elegance feels so nice.....???

chua bing

i miss you, delicious taiwanese bread. this was the biggest polo bun that i had ever seen in my life. unfortunately, i don't think the picture quite conveys the hugeness of the bun, oh well.

back in the united states:

my sweet babygirl molly

and my new favorite socks!

i ruv him.

behind vromans bookstore. part of pasadena's charm are these vine-laced buildings

what's in YOUR wallet?

as you can see, i'm a relatively simple bag carrier. i don't carry around too many accessories. but some everyday essentials include: rosebud salve, shiseido sunblock, my phone, an mj wallet, cortaid cream, dragon balm, keys, blistex mint chapstick (the keys and chapstick are missing), and a furry friend. i'm weird and i actually often leave the house with one hard-boiled egg in a ziploc bag, too.... haha

2011-12-07T19:45:00.001-08:00

gossip in the grain by ray lamontagne. this song makes me want to meeeellllt... mainly because ray l's voice is soft as butter and smooth and silky like chocolate spewing from a fondue machine. haaha i sound like i've been deprived of food or something! but really, it's very good!! it might melt you into a deep sleep, but that's kind of the point.

2011-11-26T08:37:00.001-08:00

the morning news (via abc):

fact: it costs an average of 226,000 to raise a child.

"many women think they can't afford to have a baby. but they can't afford to wait. they have a biological clock. the stock in your eggs...is going down."

sad!

2011-11-24T19:42:00.000-08:00

i get sick really easily nowadays :(. my immune system used to resist all kinds of viruses because there was a time - however long and distant ago - that i actually ran a lot and rarely got sick (cardiovascular exercise makes you less prone to getting sick). now that i rarely go running and am quite stressed during the day, my body is feeling the strain and has become more vulnerable to all the germy stuff that wants to invade previously healthy hosts. i only mention this because my throat hurts again with the kind of pain that is generally indicative of an impending flu or nasty cold. however, i just drank a spoonful of Robitussin, which hopefully does the trick!

other than that, i am currently a happy camper because i just purchased proclear toric contact lenses for super cheap. i ended up paying less than $34/box, which is awesome for folks like me who have an astigmatism!

ding! + happy turkey day!

2011-11-24T14:43:00.001-08:00

i think i finally and genuinely understand the purpose of open-ended personal statements. although they incite many headaches and head-scratching... i think i can appreciate the purpose for which they were designed. yes, they provide the applicant with the opportunity to reveal the side(s) of them that the numbers contained in one's gpa or standardized test scores cannot accurately depict. but beyond that, they're supposed to require planning and discussion and hard-knock thinking because their purpose is to question your individuality and how or why that exactly fits within the framework of committing another 2-4 years of your life to grad school. so, i am grateful.... although my personal statement is driving me nuts because it's completely open-ended, it's given me the entire day to think about why i want to pursue what i want to pursue. initially, i thought that this part of the application process would be the easiest - you know, just whip up something satisfactory because it's not like the admission people are going to care THAT much about the personal statement anyway.

but you know what? the personal statement is for ME. maybe the admission committee won't be deeply impressed by my personal statement because i haven't lived through any unique hardships. or maybe the personal statement just isn't something that they want to weigh very heavily in general. honestly though, regardless of how seriously the admission committee takes what i have to say, the personal statement is for me to think long and hard about why i want to go to graduate school. it's a chance for me to reflect on my short-lived life and to think about how my experiences and gifts/talents have equipped me to embark upon this next chapter of my life. am i being pressured into doing something that i don't actually want to do? am i really ready to go [back] to school? have i demonstrated the kind of willpower and dedication that more schooling will require? why do i want to go into this profession anyway? have i learned anything insightful in the past 21 years? what's the purpose of my life!?

hahaah. it's kind of exciting... rather frustrating, but a necessary process.

lastly: happy thanksgiving!

thankful for...

2011-11-23T17:58:00.000-08:00

everything! + everyone!

whoa whoa WHOA... just some food for thought :)

2011-11-17T19:45:00.001-08:00

i was reading through colossians today, and i was really confused upon reading colossians 1:21-23:

And you, who were once alienated and hostile in mind, doing evil deeds, he has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him, if indeed you continue in the faith, stable and steadfast, not shifting from the hope of the gospel that you heard, which has been proclaimed in all creation under heaven, and of which I, Paul, became a minister. (esv)

i was really confused about the conditional statement that i have marked in the bold letters up above. if you just read it as it is at face value, it sounds like Christ will "present you holy and blameless" before God only if the reader continues in the faith, "stable and steadfast, not shifting..." it almost sounds as if salvation is contingent upon good behavior. however, because i don't believe that God's love is conditional or that God is fickle or that legalist behavior merits anybody's salvation, i read up on this particular phrase to see if there was some kind of explication regarding Paul's original intent when he wrote this letter to the colossians. what i found was this:

IF INDEED YOU CONTINUE IN THE FAITH: eige epimenete (2PPAI) te pistei: (1Sa 15:11, 1Ki 11:4, Ho 6:3, Zeph 1:6 Mt 7:22, 23,Jn 6:66, 1Jn 2:19, Mt 10:22, 24:13. Lk 8:15, 22:32. Jn 8:30, 31, 32; 15:4, 6, 9, 10, Acts 11:23; 14:22; Ro 2:6, 7, 1Co 9:27, 10:12. Gal 4:11; 5:7; 1Th 3:5; Heb 3:6, 14, 4:1, 11, 14, 10:35, 38; 2Pe 1:10; 2:18, 19, 20, 21, 22 1Jn 2:27 Re 2:10, 26)

"This phrase represents what in Greek is known as a first class conditional statement which is determined as fulfilled (thus one could substitute the word "since"). There is an added touch of eagerness in the use of ge (at least)"

isn't that interesting? when you think about these verses with human reasoning, wouldn't it actually make a lot of sense for God to justify us and love us only if we remained his saintly little creatures who obeyed him and never strayed away from his commands? in fact, as self-centered creatures, i think it's natural for us to think that people should only deserve our love and affection if they do what pleases us. (for example, how common is it to think: i will only love my husband/wife if he or she does not cheat on me and stray away) to further demonstrate this point, even parents reward their children for good behavior and punish them for misbehaving and not obeying. so why would God choose to love us and lead us toward the gates of heaven even when our walks as christians are often marked by just the opposite of what is "stable," "steadfast," and "not shifting"? what if our walks are marred by sin and doubts?

as somebody who has just recently embarked upon young adult life, i can understand why people who were once fiery christians might stray away and no longer really hold scripture all that close to their hearts anymore. to be completely honest, i used to be really critical of those kinds of people and doubt their salvation altogether. but what i realize now that i am a "real" adult is that life isn't so black and white and so much of it is about making mistakes, trying to pick up the pieces, and learning to move on. in the process, "shifting" and living out a life that is contrary to "typical Christian behavior" in one's spiritual walk can become inevitable if you grow disillusioned by the mundaneity and contradictions of life. with this in mind, i have a much greater appreciation for the FACT that God's love for me and my salvation are not dependent on a person's temporary state of mind. rather, they are backed up by Christ's sacrificial death and resurrection, which together cause God the father to see Christ's perfect life when he sees mine, which is bound to be marred by sins that are simply unacceptable for a perfect, holy, and just God. In short, he "determines as fulfilled" all the demands that are required for salvation. THAT right there, folks, is some crazy love. and if you are somebody who has undergone various seasons of life that make you unsure of whether or not you are still a child of God, then that's some really amazing reassurance.

sidenote: i think there's a difference between temporarily straying and a "temporary" straying that evolves into a permanent straying that is evidence of outright unbelief. i have no authority whatsoever in judging if a person is saved or unsaved. but i'm also not trying to say that people ought to sin freely or think little about the gravity of their sins. however, i think understanding this passage is a helpful for reminder for christians who have professed their faith but may struggle in their walks.

this is already getting really long... but here is what i believe is further evidence of God's unconditional love for us [as christians] despite our times of struggle: ecclesiastes 3:1-8. it is one my favorite passages because it speaks to God's own acknowledgment of the different seasons in life that humans encounter. i think it's indicative of the fact that God knows how we as humans function but is nevertheless willing to meet us at where we are and regardless of how we might change with time:

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace. Ecc 3:1-8

that concludes my very lengthy thought!

2011-11-15T19:03:00.000-08:00

in the thicket

A befitting quote

2011-11-13T16:07:00.001-08:00

Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who tells you otherwise is selling something. - The Princess Bride

A befitting quote for someone who is currently agonizing at the thought of returning to work after a severely jetlagged trip to the other side of the Pacific Ocean... I'm liking the idea of sitting in bed for the rest of the evening and watching that movie.. hmmm.

Random but... it's kind of ridiculous how divided Chinese people are. You can be Chinese in the context of being a mainlander, you can be Chinese in the context of being a wai sheng ren, or you can be Taiwanese in the context of being a ben sheng ren. It's really dumb, but it's almost offensive if you confuse which "kind" a 1st gen or 2nd gen Chinese or Taiwanese person is. The only things that link the three groups together are their genetic similarities and mutual understanding of Mandarin. Otherwise, it's really strange to intermix mainlanders and wai sheng ren and ben sheng ren people together. Unlike the nationalities of other countries which were also once occupied by communism, there's no such thing as being just Chinese as you can be just German or just Russian or just Korean or just Indian. Chinese people are seriously complicated folks. The weird sense of entitlement that each group has is probably the reason why we will never be a mega race... well maybe mainlanders will become a mega race?

I'm an offspring of wai sheng ren Chinese grandparents, and I don't exactly consider China as my motherland. I mean it is, but not really. Yet neither is Taiwan because wai sheng ren don't believe that Taiwan is a national state separate from mainland China. Maybe if Shanghai were its own country I'd consider that my motherland because that's where 3 of my 4 grandparents are from. SHRUG being Chinese is just complicated..

chua bing

2011-11-08T18:44:00.000-08:00

greetings from Taiwan

2011-11-08T01:23:00.001-08:00

hello from taiwan!

i've honestly lost track of the days as a result of being in what feels like a never-ending cycle of daily food comas. my trip so far has comprised of spending time with family, listening to my relatives blab on about taiwanese politics, and eating. lots of eating. i'm convinced that taiwan is the country of gluttony. the only reason i can think of as to why taiwanese people aren't obese is because people sweat like crazy as a result of the year-round humidity...

i originally intended to post a couple pictures from my iphone, but my iphone is currently dead and is taking forever to charge. so i guess this concludes my post.... haha. i'll post something else later!

happy november!

2011-11-01T19:15:00.000-07:00

i love november. it's the month of my daddy's birthday (my dad is turning 63 this year which is holy bananas crazy) and the month of thanksgiving, which is by far my favorite holiday! yup, i love it even more than christmas.

anyway, this month is especially sweet because i will be visiting my grandmother in taiwan in a few days! plus, i'll also get the chance to finally meet not one, but TWO, sets of twin babies! one pair of identical boys on my dad's side (they're more like toddlers now i think) and one pair of fraternal twinsies on my mom's side of the family who are just a year old. i'm very excited to go all camera crazy on them. :D

on a side note: it's been official for at least 14 years on my dad's side that i am no longer the youngest grandkid. i used to be the highly adored (sigh) youngest member of the yao familia, but then my little genius boy cousin popped into existence and replaced me. but then HE got replaced by the twins. but for at least 20 solid years, i had been the family baby on my mom's side. seriously.... nobody ever thought i would grow up.... but now, for the first time ever, our fourth generation of one set of twins and one half-chinese, half-korean cutie patootie pie have emerged and i am unfortunately booted off what i always thought would be my eternal status as family baby. oh well, they're cute. so i guess it's okay :)

anyway, i love november. it's just such a great month because it's not so much about gift giving as it is entirely about families getting together to feast and be merry-- which isn't to say that december/christmas aren't great! they're awesome too. but they come in second to thanksgiving! i also love that christmas music will soon be all that kost 103.5 plays. although i do have to admit that it does get pretty freaking annoying around mid-december.

also, something random. here's the soundtrack to my life ever since i've moved home from college.

1. 40 day dream - edward sharpe and the magnetic zeros
2. god put a smile on my face - coldplay
3. boy with a coin - iron & wine
4. dreams - fleetwood mac
5. the scientist - coldplay
6. rock me now - metric
7. futile devices - sufjan stevens
8. we used to wait - arcade fire
9. how to love - lil wayne
10. dog days are over - florence + the machine
11. soon we'll be found - sia

happy noviembre!!

2011-10-25T21:20:00.000-07:00

emily is always sleepy.
bedtime has officially become her new favorite time of day.

not quite sure why i referred to myself in the third person just now...

ANYWAY, the feeling of drowsiness that weighs your eyelids down while you are bundled up under comforters and blankets? with your TOESIES curled? ahhhh i love it. i can't think of a better time of day. the worst thing now is mornings. i'm still great at waking up for them (i will always be an early bird type of morning person which will forever remain a mystery to most people), but my GOODNESS do i have to fight a battle every morning just to climb out of the warmth and comfort of staying in bed and doing nothing all day. it's tough bananas!

Fall(ing)

2011-10-20T20:44:00.000-07:00

i heart california

2011-10-15T19:07:00.000-07:00

no hate to the state of texas, but i am very grateful to be back in perhaps the best state in the united states of america [NO joke]. while california certainly doesn't contain all the best cities, no other state in this union of ours can compete with california's mild and temperate weather. no other state embodies so many favorable qualities: we've got dozens of national parks (all over california), we've got, hands down, the BEST chinese food in america, we have perhaps the best public university education system in america, we are nice and tolerant toward people of all races and cultures, we have beaches everywhere, we have the entertainment industry, we are home to Apple (and i'm pretty sure we are home to Google and Yahoo as well), and most importantly of all--- we've got.......... DISNEYLAND.

anyway, after coming back from a half week trip to houston, i can say with 100% certainty that i am proud (and thankful!) to live in this great state of mine. los angeles is still a smog ridden city that is sometimes difficult to love, and southern california still lacks four distinct seasons. but after three days of trying to plan "fun" things to do in the city of houston, i decided that i probably won't be complaining about "lack of snow" for a while. i'll just go to mammoth ;)

anyway, i love you california! i could hug you.

RANDOM NOTE/lesson learned: if you ever find yourself without your driver's license just prior to entering through airport security for a domestic flight (you will obviously need your passport for international flights), you can actually still board your flight if you provide airport security with another picture id (i used my college school id) coupled with your credit card and/or social security card. i still feel like a complete idiot for having left my california driver's license at home... but i think i gained some valuable insight from the department of homeland security: ALWAYS CARRY A PICTURE ID! and something official with your name on it.

2011-10-10T07:49:00.001-07:00

if i could, i would seriously drive home from work everyday during my lunch break to take a nap. i feel like i'll really need one today..... i haven't even left for work but the day already feels like it'll be a really, really exhausting one. no surprise that people blow unnecessary proportions of the money they make on things like coffee everyday. honestly, i just want time to fast-forward to 6pm, so that i can leave work, come home again, and sleep. :(

2011-10-09T20:06:00.000-07:00

i spent the weekend in san diego this past saturday through sunday. it was deeeelightful! my boyfriend took me out to coronado for an afternoon (the island off of san diego or something like that) for my very first time! we mainly strolled around while eating candy and it was great. here are a few pictures.

visited coronado with christopher on saturday :)

a sand dollar. why are they so difficult to find in person?

build a pirate ship!

found a sweet little papery store:

freaking awesome. SHIH-TZU card!

thank you chris for a great weekend!

hurray for RAIN!

2011-10-05T07:35:00.000-07:00

Rain is one of those things that makes me squeal like a little girl. examples of other things that make me squeal like a child: seeing max and molly after not seeing them for what feels like ages (i can no longer call them puppies, i realize..), being in an airport and waiting for my flight to depart (given that there are no delays - that makes me fussy), and eating a much, much, MUCH needed and longed-after bowl of niu ruo mien (beef noodle soup). feels fitting on a rainy day like today!

anyway, greeting the rain this morning was so refreshing! it's the very first rainfall in LA, and for me, that officially marks the transition from summer into a colder and cozier autumn season. it justifies getting pumpkin spice lattes (not that i haven't already been buying them....i'm such a sucker) and it makes scarves and peacoats bare necessities in this kind of chilly weather! it almost justifies the $50 or so scarf that i've been eyeing at j.crew among the many other fall/winter clothes that i'd hate to love to spend all my paycheck on! hehe.

random thought: i know i say this (too) often, buy i loooove molly. she's the most precious dog. she's petite, but she's got such a large and warm and fuzzy dog personality. the other night, she was struggling to jump onto my bed while simultaneously holding a dog bone in her mouth. she strategized for a good 10 minutes on how she could resolve this dilemma. it was aaadddddoooorrraaabbbbllllle. almost made me squeal, haha. ;) like i've also mentioned before, i wonder if i could ever love my future child as much as i love my dogs. although, maybe my complete obsession and infatuation with my dogs (despite the fact that they are no longer puppies) is a good indication of how i will at least tolerate my children even when they are no longer in their cute and unable-to-speak-and-talk-back age.

well, the day awaits! thankful it's at least wednesday...

thoughts

2011-10-02T20:37:00.000-07:00

why don't law schools require interviews?
that is the question of the hour. i don't really understand why the entire law school admissions process is confined to basically two factors: the applicant's gpa and his/her lsat score.

it's a little strange to me, considering that ALL law school candidates should have at least some inclination toward upholding notions of integrity and justice to the highest degree. maybe that's a really idealistic interpretation of the law's purpose, but that's pretty much what i see - to me, it doesn't matter if a law school student becomes a public servant or a money making machine in the corporate or private setting. i feel like practicing the law embodies knowing the difference between right and wrong and appreciating rules because of the purpose they serve in preserving a justice-minded and fair society.

i had a conversation with a friend the other day about how some people seriously just shouldn't ever practice law because they reek of a kind of doucheyness and slimeyness that just gives an ugly reputation to the industry's practitioners as a whole. in addition, i befriended someone the other day while waiting to take the lsat, and i was so impressed by her vigor toward becoming a public defendant. even though she confessed that she wasn't very great at taking the lsat and that her gpa wasn't stellar, you could just tell that she wanted to learn the law because she actually cares about how it is implemented and how it affects people and real lives. that being said, i just feel that it's necessary for law schools to judge a person's character before admitting them based on such an impersonal numbers crunch. sure, the lsat and an individual's gpa together certainly do indicate a person's dedication and reasoning skills in the academic setting. but who's to say that those skills can't be developed or refined IN law school?

people often get burnt out once they start grad school. i've seen it in my friends and family. yet in the process of preparing for their med school or pharm school interviews, people usually enter into their respective graduate/professional schools with noble ideals that either diminish or simply disintegrate altogether once they begin their schooling because of the cost and burden of devoting another 3-4 years of their life to higher education. in fact, i think it's natural to lose sight of the goal and purpose and calling of your career pursuit once your youth starts to lose its luster. but i think that starting off law school (or any other type of grad school, for that matter) with a genuine sense of purpose and intention is seriously better than starting off law school without anything at all. in professions that seriously do affect people's lives and exists to preserve order and justice, why WOULDN'T you want to see where your law school candidate is coming from? as my friend and i discussed: if only law schools could look into people's souls....

just a pretty picture

2011-09-27T22:10:00.000-07:00

i'm truthfully a little surprised that tomorrow is already Wednesday. in school, Wednesdays would always, always catch me by surprise. once i began working, i thought the same effect would take place. but nope! nothing suffices but the sweetness of a Friday.

anyway, the picture is one of my street. random scenes in movies are often shot on this street. i mean, there are a LOT grander houses that creative film people could target: pasadena is filled with 'em. in fact, episodes of mad men are filmed in pasadena on green street! but i don't blame them for choosing streets like these. they've got a special kind of charm :)

okay bedtime calls!

why, monday? whyyyyyyyyy?

2011-09-26T07:49:00.001-07:00

another long week awaits. Mondays are seriously the toughest. the toughest to climb out of bed for and the toughest to muster up the courage to maintain a good attitude and outlook for the rest of the week.

i'm wondering if there's any profession out there that i'd actually be excited to wake up on a monday for. *SHRUG* i can think of a few. anyhow, the day awaits. good-bye!

soothing

2011-09-24T19:09:00.000-07:00

a night of studying, a cup of tea, the night breeze. i love little moments like these. even when they involve dreaded studying!

2011-09-24T14:21:00.000-07:00

one of the ads that facebook thinks is relevant to me. psh i happen to like my doggies fat and fluffy.

Fighting Pet Obesity with...

‘Like’ to get your pet moving towards a healthier weight.

Like · 174,771 people like this.

2011-09-22T18:47:00.001-07:00

working life is not easy! i probably just lived/survived through the busiest week that i have yet experienced in my time at the law firm where i work! seriously, at least in college, periodic moments of extreme stress are interspersed with good times, laughter and cheer. come to think of it, in those days, all you're really held accountable for is earning above satisfactory grades and not cheating. that's it! the rest of the time, you get to play and pretend to be a carefree hippee. that's seriously the best thing about college. you get to be a pseudo adult without any responsibilities.

but. when you're supposed to be a responsible, working adult..... you just have this omnipresent cloud of stress that follows you everywhere. i get it. i totally get it. i find that work related things even pop up in my dreams every so often. i find that when i'm in the shower, something related to some random task i performed that day just paralyzes me for a good 2 minutes: did i do this or that correctly? o.m.g did i check it forty billion times? i DID check it forty billion times. why didn't i check it one more time!?

anyway, all i have to say is that i am so grateful that tomorrow is friday. i am in serious need of this weekend to just unwind and oh yeah! study for the lsat because i have freaking one week left before the most life-dictating/life-altering standardized exam of my youthful life! actually, it's really not that terrible of an ordeal. just one of the many hurdles in life that i must leap over without twisting my ankle.

however, let's keep things in perspective and acknowledge that life is good. life is great! and complaining is not! in addition to every next friday that i begin looking forward to on FRIDAY (lol), i just want to express that i am also soooo very grateful for my loved ones who let me have my momentary rants.

gotsta go study!

AUTUMN

2011-09-17T16:58:00.000-07:00

i love autumn. i love fall weather, i love fall colors, i love fall fashion, and i love fall holidays. just thought i'd let the entire world know.

okay, now i go back to studying :(

hope

2011-09-16T19:15:00.000-07:00

my grandparents have been married for over 60+ years. i think that their era is incredible, in that the members of their generation learned how to cope with unbearably difficult circumstances and stick it out through the tough times. for my grandparents, for instance, there was no cowering in fear and surrendering at the hands of the japanese and then the communists when they lived in china. times were difficult in ways that i can never imagine, but they witnessed so much of life together as one unit. it's a matter of fact that they are now nearing the end - and i applaud them not for their life accomplishments or even the love that they have for one another. rather, i applaud them for demonstrating what it means to persevere and grow old together. you really don't see much of that anymore.

as the prospect of marriage has become ever more real to me recently, a lot of my fears have actually surfaced into plain light. i truthfully believed that i had resolved all of the byproducts of my parents' divorce until not too long ago. but for the longest time, i think the failure of my parents' marriage had actually subconsciously led me to believe that: 1. love will never be enough, 2. that it would be impossible to remain forever satisfied with your spouse, and 3. that you just cannot have faith in people. it doesn't matter if it's the husband or the wife... people. just. suck.

it's funny because those subconscious "beliefs" aren't false statements at all. in fact, they depict reality quite accurately. love really isn't enough to accomplish anything. love for a person and love for an object can't bring us joy and fulfillment in the way that were designed to experience them. and frankly, as emotional human beings, it is also literally impossible to remain constantly satisfied by anybody or anything, whether that person (or thing) be your spouse or your mom or your best friends or your iphone. it's just impossible to be content when you rely on your own strength. thirdly, of course people suck. PEOPLE ARE SINNERS, after all. we fail everyday! the last thing you should ever do is rely on another person to bring you soul satisfaction. that just ain't gonna work, emily. that just AIN'T gonna work.

i've been busy sorting out these kinds of thoughts in my head and i'm still in the process of learning what it means to trust God with something as huge and colossal and life-changing as marriage. maybe this is just another "symptom" of being a kid from a divorced family... but i am simply really annoying when it comes to being overly cautious about anything related to marriage. i tread over this topic reallllllly carefully because i am tremendously scared to repeat my parents' mistakes, which i don't think is a bad thing. but it makes the process of "becoming ready" a slow one. slow because it always takes time to get the engine running and warmed up. and slow because learning how to trust in my invisible father in heaven takes real faith. so what it comes down to is how great my faith is. and to be honest, my faith is not too big because i am an arrogant little human being who thinks that her wisdom surpasses God's. i'm an idiot! if only my faith were the size of a mustard seed!

okay all of this was actually a big huge tangent from what i actually wanted to blog about. i started off the entry talking about my grandparents because the entire focus of this post was supposed to point out that my grandparents give me hope when it comes to marriage. i hear them bicker about petty little things and then promptly forget about what they were even bickering about. i see them serve each other in countless ways. i see them make executive decisions for each other, i see them (brace yourself) HOLD HANDS IN PUBLIC, i see them ladle soup for each other, and other little things that give me hope that it's not impossible.

there is this idiotic and annoying housefly that i want to murder. so i began to wonder.... why do flies buzz?
(answer) Flies are among the fastest of all flying insects. The buzzing of a fly is the sound of its wings beating. A house fly's wings beat about 200 times a second, and some midges move their wings 1,000 times a second. House flies fly at an average speed of 4 and 1/2 miles (7.2 kilometers) per hour. They can fly even faster for short distances to escape their enemies, which include people and many birds.

remembrance

2011-09-11T11:33:00.001-07:00

it is difficult to imagine that 10 years have already passed by since the tragic events of september 11. i distinctly remember waking up to my mother's voice over the phone against the backdrop of voices and frightening images coming from the television. back then, my mom worked closely with bank investors working at the new york stock exchange. as you can imagine, everyone was completely shocked and had no idea how the day would unravel.

since then, most of us have grown up and moved on. but does anybody recall the period of patriotism that was riled up soon after the terrorist attacks? i remember watching united 93 (the movie), and feeling completely overwhelmed by an appreciation for the freedom we have in the u.s., overwhelmed by a momentary but devout patriotism, and overwhelmed by some sort of a resolve that america would conquer terrorists and would show the world that its ideals and values would trump anybody who wanted to take away those values. remember that little sliver of time during which people would put u.s flags on their cars and place stickers of the u.s flag on their bumpers and windows? but those feelings really were just momentary. most of us snapped out of it soon after the u.s catapulted itself into a series of world events that demonstrated quite clearly that our nation's political leaders might actually be severely inept and incapable. instead of placing flag stickers onto our bumpers, we placed stickers deploring our political leaders and decided to harbor anger and resentment toward the u.s government.

even though 10 years have already passed with the advent of new troubles and the collected series of (justifiable) doubts that we now have in our leaders, i think we should all acknowledge that patriotism is just as necessary in america today as it was 10 years ago. while we've been raising our fists at u.s politicians and questioning their leadership, we've lost so much faith in our country and its core values. for example, the dismal economy has already made so many americans (like myself) lose faith in the country, our politicians, and most tragically, the democratic process itself. so as we honor and remember all those who lost their lives on september 11th and those who continue to fight for our freedoms and liberties today, i just hope that we also remember the sentiments that were produced by such a catastrophic event in u.s history. and i hope that that remembrance of the love and appreciation we once had for this nation can help us reorient ourselves with regards to how we ought to actively fight for the preservation of a country so entangled in a mess of depraved values and depressed economy.

2011-09-08T07:49:00.000-07:00

This week is still going by pretty slowly on my end. Last night, I just kept thinking: t's only Thursday tomorrow?! Why.

But I know why it's going by slowly. It's because I'm looking forward to this weekend's festivities a little too excitedly, hehe: my friends are getting married on Saturday, my boyfriend whom I haven't seen in over a month is coming down to LA, and I'm just always excited in general when the weekend arrives!

Anyway, I'm going to head out soon for work! Bye bye blog.

best ever.

2011-09-03T17:45:00.000-07:00

2011-09-02T21:40:00.000-07:00

although i've lived through 20 labor day weekends, this is my first labor day weekend that is actually going to be meaningful because i am a full-time working person -- aka, i am now a laborer who rejoices at the prospect of spending 3 glorious days resting and not being bombarded by responsibilities! so i thought it would be appropriate to reflect on my first month of work.

in fact, i've been meaning to blog about my job/life for a while. there's so much that i want to say, feelings that i want to convey, etc. to everybody who reads my blog. but honestly.... by the time i get back home, by the time i even remember that i had wanted to blog about something, i am simply plain fatigued and relived that another weekday has passed. so i've been pushing off a blogpost about what it's like to be a recent college grad, a recent college grad living at home, & a recent college grad with a new job. but now that i have some time to actually reflect, here goes!

1. life as a recent college grad.
life as a recent college grad is filled with lots of hope and reasonable anticipation for the future. the "future" really is in reach - career aspirations and goals, the progression of a relationship - all of that is so attainable that it's really quite scary! at the same time, life as a recent college grad is also filled with lots of reminiscent longings for my college years, which are now (shockingly!) behind me. i was so sad to leave san diego - on the car ride home, i just felt tremendously burdened by the fact that my college youth was actually OVER. but in reality... once you snap out of that kind of emo angst, you realize that it's actually not so horrible to poke your head into the real world and get a glimpse of life outside the college bubble. it's quite refreshing actually. and filled with new adventures! which is always awesome.

3. home!
anyway, since i've moved back to la, life has been filled with transitions. at first, i was pretty overwhelmed by the mere fact that i had to unload and unpack all of the things that i had acquired over the past 3 years into those once familiar closets and drawers in a once familiar house. excuse the metaphor, but there's something about that very act that makes you feel a little suffocated... almost as though you are being robbed of your freedom a little bit. but as the weeks passed, living at home proved itself to be obviously much more than bearable. home-cooked meals every single day? YES! zero rent? YES! not having to do my own laundry!?!??? YES! okay but seriously. if i've learned anything from moving back home, it's that i really appreciate my parents. so, so much! it's true that my freedom has diminished a little bit. it's also true that my life is pretty much openly transparent to my family in a way that feels so foreign. but despite the cons, i am entirely grateful for home. my parents lavish me in a way that seems highly inappropriate for a college grad. but hey, i'm also the second-born child of two asian daughters. we gets the spoiling..and we luvvvs it :).

2. new job!
my job story is a pretty miraculous one. i do NOT attribute my obtaining it by any of my own merits because it honestly went down like this: the night after i turned in my last college paper, i applied to maybe 10-15 jobs or so. within the next 2 days, i received maybe 3-4 phone calls. law firms in la wanted to interview me and i thought, sure why not. that same weekend, i packed up all my things and moved home. of 3 potential interviews, i canceled two of the interviews, and decided to still attend one, not thinking that i would get it at ALL. long story short, i got the one job that i actually had interest in and interviewed for, and i began work the following week. really, i can only attribute the "gift" of having a job to the overabundant grace and mercy of God.

anywaaay, that just about sums up all that i have the energy to write about! i will try to update more frequently with better life updates. until then, good night!

Oh, Grow Up

2011-09-02T09:24:00.000-07:00

Editorial from the New York Times. (Well-written and to the point. Read it if you have any interest at all in the absurdity that is U.S Politics.)

Whenever we think Washington couldn’t get more cynical or more craven, it proves us wrong. So we will resist the temptation to say it’s hard to imagine anything more base than the food fight over President Obama’s planned speech to Congress.

The contemptuous reaction from the House speaker, John Boehner, to the president’s request to address a joint session next Wednesday — the day Congress returns from its summer recess — was appalling. No matter how he feels about Mr. Obama personally or politically, there can be no excuse for his lack of respect for the office, to which he is second in the line of succession. And it was distressing to watch President Obama fail, once again, to stand up to an opposition that won’t brook the smallest compromise.

What made this even more appalling is that the president will be speaking on the country’s most pressing problem — the need to create jobs and stave off another destructive recession.

Mr. Obama’s request should have been routine. And The Times on Thursday quoted a White House official as saying it was: Obama aides consulted Boehner aides and then sent a formal request for a joint session on Wednesday. But Mr. Boehner said the date wasn’t convenient, a rebuff of the chief executive that the Senate historian’s office said seemed unprecedented.

It’s possible that the White House failed to seek Mr. Boehner’s back-room agreement before making its formal request. That’s hard to believe, even from an administration that is maladroit politically, to put it kindly.

But even if that were true. So what?

Mr. Boehner said there are votes scheduled on Wednesday evening, but they seem to be profoundly unimportant and, in any case, this is the same speaker who repeatedly postponed votes on whether to save the nation from default. What could possibly be so pressing this time?

It’s also possible that the White House failed to notice that the contenders for the Republican presidential nomination have a debate on Wednesday, or deliberately tried to upstage it. If either is true, shame on the White House.

But, again, so what?

The Republican candidates did not seem to care. Some seemed eager to be up against Mr. Obama on television. And a presidential address on jobs and the faltering economy certainly trumps one of 20 planned debates among the contenders for the Republican nomination.

Mr. Obama’s people negotiated with Mr. Boehner’s people behind closed doors. When they emerged, the White House caved, to no one’s surprise. The speech will take place on Thursday.

One day won’t make a difference, but the political spectacle and the final result only served to further underscore the president’s weakness. Worse, the vital importance of the speech — and the need for Congress to take its full responsibility for creating jobs and reviving the economy — was upstaged by yet another Washington soap opera.

I never tire from this song

2011-08-30T18:42:00.000-07:00

This is one of the songs that made me a huge Metric fan back during my sophomore year of high school. You just have to listen to the melody. It's so totally amazing. The lyrics might read a little cuckoo, but it's actually really deep and profound.

The town where she was born, like town where I was born was built by white settlers seeking gold and other treasures.
Like me she feels uncomfortable in the clothing of her ancestors.
"It's not easy," she would say, dipping her fingers into the ashtray, "It's not easy to erase your blood."

Rock me now
(come on, sing with me)
in the arms of cobwebs
Roll me out in the arms of cobwebs

Once she found a man to treasure and together they'd planted flowers of warning, fearing frost.
Late on the shallow evenings while their enemies slept, they hammered the soil asking for answers in green.
His value declined when he offered his name. Why did he offer?

His value declined when he offered his name.
(Ah ah ah ah ah)
His value declined when he offered his name.

When she was 7 years old she saw a man get shot but, no one came for a long time because it happened in a remote parking lot in Las Vegas.
And she was waiting for her mom to come back from working the blackjack table at the Circus Circus casino.
And that night her mom said that the two of them and the now dead guy were the only 3 people who ever really lived in Las Vegas.
Everybody else just arrived, ate their complimentary shrimp cocktail, and left.

Rock me now in the arms of cobwebs
(It's a one room city, yeah)
Roll me out in the arms of cobwebs
(So can you roll with me?)
His value declined when he offered his name.

It's a one room city the wall to wall to wall to wall goes to street to street to street

Reblogged from Joshua Harris

2011-08-30T14:07:00.000-07:00

Only One Right Person
Josh Harris

It helps me to remember that one day in heaven there will be only one right person.

I'm sorry, but it won't be you. Or me.

It will be God.

Everybody else in heaven will be wrong in a million different ways about a million different things. The Bible tells us that only those who trusted in Jesus Christ, who turned from sin and believed in him, will be in God's presence. But on a host of secondary matters, we'll all discover how much we got wrong.

Maybe some people picture heaven as a place where all the "right" people celebrate that they made it. But I don't think that's true. I think it will be a place of beautiful humility.

The funny thing is I'm really looking forward to this aspect of heaven. I can't wait for that crystal-clear awareness of all the opinions and attitudes and ideas and strategies that I had in this life that were quiet simply wrong.

No one will be proud. No one will be bragging. We all will want to talk about how wrong we were about so many things and how kind God was to us. I can imagine someone saying, "Seriously, I am the most unworthy person here."

And then someone else will say, "No, friend, it took more grace for me to be here. You need to hear my story."

And we'll say, "No offense, King David, but we've already heard your story. Let somebody else share." (Of course we'll let him share again later.)

At the end of every conversation, we'll agree that when we were back on the old earth, we really had no idea how unmerited that grace really is. We called it grace, but we didn't really think it was totally grace. We thought we'd added just a tad of something good. That we had earned just a bit. We'll realize to our shame that to differing degrees we trusted in our intellect, our morality, the rightness of our doctrine, and our religious performance when all along it was completely grace.

"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast" (Ephesians 2:8-9).

Every one of us will have a lot to apologize for.

I estimate that somewhere near the first ten thousand years of heaven will be taken up with the redeemed people of God apologizing to each other for all the ways we judged each other, jostled for position, were proud and divisive and arrogant toward each other. (Of course this is just an estimate; it could be the first twenty thousand years.)

I imagine Paul telling Barnabas he's sorry for splitting up the team over Mark. And admitting to Mark how he should have been more willing to give him another chance. And then all the Christians from first-century Corinth will tell Paul how bad they feel about what a complete pain they were for him.

All the people in churches who split over silly things like organ music will come together and hug each other. The Baptists and Presbyterians will get together, and one side will have to admit to the other side that they were wrong about baptism. And then the side that was right will say they're sorry for their pride and all the snide comments they made. And then there will be no more sides, and the whole thing will be forgotten.

Because of course we'll all be happy to forgive each other. And we'll keep saying, "But God used it for good. We couldn't see it then, but he was at work even in our weakness and sin."

In the meantime, we should strive to hold our beliefs with a charity and kindness that won't embarrass us in heaven.

An excerpt from chapter 11 of Dug Down Deep.

happy almost september!

2011-08-28T10:16:00.001-07:00

seriously strange things i learn from asian women

2011-08-24T21:17:00.000-07:00

(1) According to my mom (whose health "findings" I generally believe whether or not they are supported by scientific data), Asian women get less wrinkly and saggy in the face in comparison to their white counterparts because Asian PEOPLE in general have smaller eyes. Apparently, the size of your eyes varies directly with the amount of stress exerted in stretching the skin around your eyes. Hence, small eyes = smaller stress = fewer wrinkles. Who knew having tiny eyes could actually play to one's advantage?

(2) According to my mom, "God is fair." My mom verifies this often-forgotten fact on the basis that people who are usually beautiful in their youth turn ugly when they get older, and vice versa. This is her EXACT example: When you see a Caucasian baby, you think they are so beautiful. Those big eyes, they look like dolls! Those Caucasian girls, they are so beautiful and look like flowers. But what happens when they get older? They get wrinkles and they sag. Asian people, on the contrary, generally look very immature for most of their lives. Most of us don't look look very "womanly" ("flower-like, if you will). Asians do not have that kind of Hollywood beauty that white women are more likely to naturally have. But when Asians get old, they don't look scary.

OKAY the above is a little borderline racist...don't take offense. But I mean, even if it's not scientifically or statistically verifiable, the point is that beauty is vain. It comes and goes. Some people are able to cling onto it in their youth and lose it as they age - others are unable to fully obtain it in their youth, but are able to maintain more of it as they get older. Sure, there might be people who remain "beautiful" all their lives, but cultural norms change within the span of a lifetime, anyhow. Conclusion: beauty. is. vain.

(3) According to my step-mom (she believes in a lot of strange midwife's tales...), the earlier you have children, the smarter they will come out. According to this (promising?) theory, the younger a woman is when she bears kids, the more likely she will pass on favorable genes. Such favorable genes apparently include a higher IQ. She actually encouraged me on my 20th birthday to get married soon and have kids soon. That was truthfully a little awkward. But hey, maybe that's the secret toward breeding the next generation's Einstein.

2011-08-24T19:40:00.000-07:00

goodness.

i am so absolutely thrilled that tomorrow is thursday.

why?
because FRIDAY comes after thursday.

and you know what comes after friday?
peace. rest. relaxation. the weekend.

my thought ends here. hahah

2011-08-21T11:07:00.000-07:00

But none of us wants to be merely safe. We were not created merely to be safe. The human heart wants infinitely more than safety. O yes, safety is basic and necessary. We want to be protected from what can destroy us. We want life. Life. But we want more than mere life. We want abundant life. Overflowing life. Deep life. Weighty life. Joyful life. We don't just want to survive. We want to thrive. At every level of our human being. We were made for this.

And so Jesus says more: "I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved [yes, and more, so much more] and will go in and out and find pasture." The point of saying this is that the sheepfold itself represents safety and protection. But sheep don't want to stay there. If fact they will die if they stay in the safety of the fold. They want green pastures and still waters.

And I think that when Jesus says in verse 10, "I came that they may have life and have it abundantly," he means, "I came that they might be saved and go out and come and find pasture." Protection and Plenty. Solid safety and deep soul satisfaction. Abundant life is not about having stuff. It's about having peace. Having Joy. Having God.

So thank you, Jesus, for being a door for us. We believe you are the only door to eternal safety. The only door to soul-satisfying pastures. The only door to God. We enter. Thank you.

excerpt from "My Abandoned Life for Your Abundant Life" by John Piper

Saturday morning.

2011-08-20T09:26:00.000-07:00

I have never appreciated the quiet calmness and tranquility of a Saturday morning as much as I do now. A strong cup of coffee, Sufjan Stevens, a long walk = bliss. Now, off to the library for some good old fashioned studying..

some photos!

2011-08-17T19:09:00.000-07:00

the building i work at! i'm on the 9th floor of this professional building:

toward the back of my building. i love ivy and green foliage against red bricked walls. such a beautiful contrast

the view from one of the rooms in our office! all the rooms have views similar to these... except a lot vaster since my iphone can only capture so much!

a couple of maccarons i bought from europane. which is also super close to my office

the blackberry one, up close and personal

oh and here is our little precious max who suffers from alpha male syndrome

2011-08-16T19:17:00.000-07:00

Bailey: i bought index cards today
for gres...
sigh
stupid test...
maybe i should wait til you become a lawyer so you can just pay for some classes
kekeke
i guess i'll settle for you paying for my wedding then

darn you teeth!

2011-08-15T22:41:00.000-07:00

i've been having tooth sensitivity for quite some time. i've visited three (3) dentists who have all told me that i do NOT have a cavity in the area of sensitivity. one dentist told me something along the lines of "you're just imagining it." the second one told me that i "just have sensitive teeth," and recommended sensodyne. the third dentist recommended that the nerves in one's mouth often miscircuit (i'm making up a word) themselves and filled in the cavities in other areas of my mouth.
in all instances, i have taken x-rays that don't reveal anything that is actually wrong with my teeth.

so what did i do?
1. i gave it some time (this SLIGHT sensitivity began 2 years ago).
2. after dentist visit #2, i used sensodyne. helped for a while.
3. after the pain progressively got worse, i got those fillings and that's where i am now. waiting.

now i have it pretty bad. i've webMD'd all my symptoms... but there's no clear indication of anything. i have toothaches that last and then go away throughout the day. before, it was just at night. now it's haunting me even in my waking hours!

so my question is: has anybody else experienced this kind of (unbearable) pain that costs you hours of sleep? and if so, is this what happens when your wisdom teeth are in the process of descending...?

2011-08-14T09:31:00.000-07:00

my first full work week starts tomorrow! i know that i'll be in for at least some - perhaps a lot? - of stressful and busy days... but thankfully, europane is super close to my office. i can't wait to mosy on over there one of these next couple of days for an egg salad sandwich and their incredible desserts (macarons, anyone?)! i've been there a couple times, and i'm excited to become a seasoned regular :)...

man, as a girl who has a tamed, inner-shopoholicsm, it's sooooo tempting once you start working to want to buy everything. in college, when i was on a fixed budget, i would buy things only every so often mainly because i would feel guilty for spending the money that my parents allotted to me on extravagant things. i've learned to control that urge to splurge!!

anyway, now that i'm actually making my own money, i feel really liberated--- although that certainly does not mean that i'm going to indulge myself recklessly. but still. the sense of liberation is soo nice.

IMISSU

2011-08-12T19:37:00.000-07:00

first day of work

2011-08-11T19:08:00.000-07:00

so today marks day 1 of my new job. and goodness me, it's quite a lot of work! it's now quite understandably clear to me as to why attorneys have terrible work hours. why they might appear to be in a seemingly never-ceasing dour kind of mood. there's a lot of pressure, and there just AREN'T enough hours in a day to do absolutely everything! i gather all this from being a mere legal assistant.

in my baby experience of working with the attorneys that i work for both presently and the ones that i have worked with in the past (4 total), i realize that when you're advocating for another human being, it's really such a huge responsibility. you have to rack your brain constantly. make the best case for this person or that. you've really got to love your law (and by love, i mean love sacrificially and overlook the way it eats away your time). and if you want to practice it in a way that truly sets you apart from the rest of them lawyers, well... i have a feeling that that kind of endeavor will simply require a lot painful sacrifices. not the kind of sacrifices that i'm willing to make.

bahah. okay bye.

and i forgot to add :)

2011-08-09T20:40:00.000-07:00

breathe

2011-08-09T19:52:00.000-07:00

these past couple of days have been a little bit overwhelming.... to say the least. i didn't really go all out in my commitment in looking for a job, and so i honestly didn't really anticipate on actually getting opportunities to interview so soon after finishing college (which was, to date, roughly 2 weeks ago). but upon moving back home, i was interviewed and a week later - yesterday - i was offered a job! the news came a couple days after the economy seemed to take an even seemingly more depressing dive. but i was really fortunate and i'm really grateful!

grateful, but nevertheless overwhelmed! so overwhelmed. i feel like this year is already unfolding out to be one of many adjustments. for instance, chris visited me this weekend, and after he left sunday late afternoon, i just thought: "man. if i were still in college, i'd be driving WITH HIM back down to san diego. i'd be in the passenger seat and we'd be chatting along, chris would tell me to keep him awake until we finally saw the familiar 'la jolla village drive' exit, and we'd be... 'home,' (whatever that means nowadays). i wouldn't be waving good-bye, not knowing the exact when and where i would see him next." but that's just one of the new transitions that i know i'll be experiencing this year: a long-distance relationship!

and of course: a new job, the newfound adult responsibility of "saving money," possibly a new church, the whole grad school process thingamajig, new goals, new pursuits. i dunno, seems like a lot to digest in just one year! in fact, i was thinking earlier today about how much i might miss the "freedom" of being unemployed - having hours at my leisure to go running, to take long naps, to study, to play with my dogs. but there's no time to be reminiscent of the stay-at-home lifestyle that i have maintained for the past couple of weeks. i'm starting my new job on thursday!

lastly, thank you everyone for the congratulatory messages! :) i'm sure i'll have a lot of happy/sad/good/bad/and other emotion-filled lessons to learn in the coming weeks!

my week in a nutshell

2011-08-04T13:22:00.000-07:00

<-- beautiful is he not?!

Hello everyone! I can't believe that it's been nearly a week since I packed all my things from San Diego and moved back home. Mostly, I feel like I'm on a mini vacation with a personal chef (haha, I know, that's a terrible thing to say). I'm pretty sure the feeling will wear off soon after I actually finish the whole law school application process and must finally answer the big, daunting question: What do I do from here?

Thankfully, I'm not at that particular set of crossroads just yet. Instead, I mostly study during the day (that keeps my mind pretty tired and occupied most of the day) and play with my two lovable dogs. I chase them around the house and they nap on my lap. Pretty uneventful I would say.... anyway, more pictures to come later!

just a few more :)

2011-07-31T17:50:00.000-07:00

:) my baaaaby.

some snappy shots

2011-07-30T11:51:00.000-07:00

(molly momo is sad to leave. hence the look of longing.)

2011-07-29T08:11:00.001-07:00

My good friend Michelle sent me this encouragement today, which I really, really, really needed. I must have slept at most four hours last night. I just kept waking up and tossing and turning. I'm surprised Molly (my dog who sleeps with me) could sleep soundly with all my anxiety and tirelessness rolling around and about. Anyway, thanks Michelle! :)

"God does not want us to live in worry or fear. He wants us to live with bold confidence in his power. "For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline." In the Bible, we see a pattern in Peace doesn’t come from finding a lake with no storms. It comes from having Jesus in the boat. God rarely sends people into situations where their comfort level is high. Rather He promises to be with them in their fear. It is God’s presence — not comfortable circumstances — that brings people to the best version of themselves."

"I asked a wise man, “How do you assess the well-being of your soul?” He immediately said that he asks himself two questions: Am I growing more easily discouraged these days? Am I growing more easily irritated these days? At the core of a flourishing soul are the love of God and the peace of God. If peace is growing in me, I am less easily discouraged. If love is growing, I am less easily irritated. It was a brilliantly helpful diagnostic to assess the health of my soul."

- John Ortberg

a new life mantra

2011-07-28T11:29:00.000-07:00

Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, find harmony. In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity. – Albert Einstein

An excerpt

2011-07-28T10:06:00.000-07:00

Compounding the problem with the current majority in the House is the detached disdain with which issues of governance are regarded by much of the populace. The common refrain of "what are those clowns in Washington going to do next" seems to absolve the rest of society for having elected such individuals. But the simple truth is that the problems in Washington were not created in the nation's capital -- they were created by electing people who represent two very different and incompatible governing philosophies.

One philosophy seeks to continue government programs in roughly the same manner they now exist with whatever combination of spending reductions and tax increases that may be necessary to close the budget deficit; the other aims to radically shrink the size and scope of government (with massive cuts to social programs like Medicare and Medicaid) so that taxes can be cut below current levels. In short, we have a dysfunctional government because we have a dysfunctional society -- a society that expects all the best without recognizing that each generation must pay its dues and that no society will move forward if parochial concerns repeatedly trump a broad-based commitment to the common good.

Read the whole article.

psalm 117

2011-07-25T09:04:00.000-07:00

Praise the Lord, all nations!
Extol him, all peoples!
For great is his steadfast love toward us,
and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever.
Praise the Lord!

day 2

2011-07-22T09:57:00.000-07:00

i'm off to campus in a little bit. but before i go, here's day 2's "what i'll miss about being in san diego." easily put, i'm going to miss my room! but beyond that, i'm going to miss my room because it's filled with memories of my friendships and relationships from these past 3 years :). from encouragement hearts to collages to surprises that chris has left me on anniversaries and such, my room's filled with lots of love.

also, i'd just like to say that i have my 8 law schools cemented down (i think...). i want to announce what they are, but it's too early and presumptuous of me to do so since i still have to take the lsat. but at that point, i'll finally be able to point my finger at where i might be going in the next year or so! will i stay in california? will i travel across the country? we'll see!

anyway, it's kind of annoying that i keep talking about law schools/my future/and the lsat, isn't it? unfortunately, i'm probably going to continue doing so rather consistently for the next few months. it's just the nature of the waiting game. sooooo, i apologize in advance if this blog suddenly becomes inundated with that sort of talk. i'll try my best to keep it to a minimum!

lastly, happy friday + happy weekend!

day 1: what i'll miss about being in san diego

2011-07-21T20:17:00.000-07:00

i seriously need to need to
1] keep studying. nothing new there, ha.
2] get cracking on my final paper
3] get started on a statement of purpose for one of my professors.
4] go the gym and stop bumming in my boyfriend's sweatshirt while pulling my hair out at those gosh darn logic games

(end rant.) im looking forward to a productive friday and productive weekend ahead. i can't believe i'll be finished with er...college...in a week! time seriously flies. anyway, i'm taking pictures of some little things here and there in san diego that i'll seriously miss once i have to go back home and start the next stage of my young adult my life. i'll try my best to fill this blog with more interesting stuff as my time as a college student officially draws to an end. anyway, im going to figure out my plans for tomorrow and be absolutely resolved (i hope!) to cross things off my to-do list. isn't that just the best feeling ever?

anyway, here's day #1's "what i'm going to miss about being in san diego" series.

i used to not be much of a fan of regents pizzeria... but since this summer began, i've somehow found a whole lot of happiness in eating their chicago-style popeye pizza with chris while we watch tv and tell each other about our days. :-) i am aware of how this must make us seem like a boring old couple. but sometimes, the simple things are simply the best things!

la, i'm coming back home for you very soon.

2011-07-21T09:15:00.000-07:00

2011-07-20T10:01:00.000-07:00

Let now the weak say I have strength
By the spirit of power that raised Christ from the dead
Let now the poor stand and confess
That my portion is Him and I'm more than blessed

Let now our hearts burn with a flame
A fire consuming all for your Son's holy name
And with the heavens we declare
You are our king

2011-07-15T22:15:00.001-07:00

There's nothing quite like sharing a heaping bowl of soup from Whole Foods, eating lunch leftovers, and sipping a cold glass of Manzanita del Sol while watching mine and le boyfriend's new favorite TV series.

:) Today was a wonderful day!

Spurgeon's Story of the Gardner (via Josh Harris)

2011-07-13T22:04:00.000-07:00

(Original link)

A child had a little garden in which she planted many flowers, but they never grew. She put them in, as she thought tenderly and carefully, but they would not live. She sowed seeds and they sprang up; but very soon they withered away. So she ran to her father's gardener, and when he came to look at it, he said, "I will make it a nice garden for you, that you may grow whatever you want." He fetched a pick, and when the little child saw the terrible pick, she was afraid for her little garden. The gardener struck his tool into the ground and began to make the earth heave and shake for his pickaxe had caught the edge of a huge stone which underplayed almost all the little plot of ground. All the little flowers were turned out of their places and the garden spoiled for a season so that the little maid wept much. He told her he would make it a fair garden yet, and so he did, for having removed that stone which had prevented all the plants from striking root he soon filled the ground with flowers which lived and flourished.

Just so, the Lord has come, and has turned up all the soil of your present comfort to get rid of some big stone that was at the bottom of all your spiritual prosperity, and would not let your soul flourish. Do not weep with the child, but be comforted by the blessed results and thank your Father's tender hand!

Don't read this. it's a waste of your time.

2011-07-13T08:12:00.000-07:00

Argentina: Defeat of the Spanish empire -> civil war between the unitarians (centralists) and federalists -> radical governments (1916-1930) under yrigoyen -> coup of 1930 -> installed uruburu ("infamous decade")-> until military coup of 1943 by gou (grupo de oficiales unidos) -> eventually, peron becomes president in 1946 (think, evita. don't cry for me argentina! the truth is i never left you...) -> reelected in 1951 -> deposed in coup of 1955 (led by lonardi) -> arumbaru becomes president from 1955-58, followed by fragile civilian governments until 1966 -> next coup! of 1966, which establishes ongania as de facto president, leads into series of military-appointed presidents (era of authoritarian-bureaucratic state) (parallel with chile's pinochet regime in 1973) -> peron returns, reelected 1973 but dies a year later -> his 3rd wife isabel becomes president -> she fails and military returns.

Brazil: significance of Brazil's decolonization. trends of abolition, military + republicanism
1880s - republicanism becomes widely accepted -> political culture of old republic is crticized by everyone (dominated by landed interests, little concern for promoting industrialization and urbanization) -> bourgeois and military discontent (heightened by great depression's impact on brazilian economy) leads to coup of 1930, that ousts luis and installs vargas (1930) -> vargas and estado novo (there is no legislature, governs by decree) - vargas' political opponents initiate crisis which leads him to commit suicide 1954 -> caretaker regimes -> until 1956-61, kubitschek government (makes brasilia capitol) -> quadros/goulart -> ousted in coup of 1964 -> 1964-85 Brazil is governed by succession of authoritarian governments -> 1985 marks end of military regimes via process of negotiated transition toward democracy with the election of neves, the first civilian president since 1964

Chile: 1870s: Chile's most famous foreign conflict: the war of the pacific - Chile fought both Peru and Bolivia for mineral-rich coastal strip that had belonged to Peru and Bolivia -> leads to Chile's nitrate boom -> 2nd half of 1880s: presidency of balmaceda -> wanted to increase government intervention in economy/needed higher tax revenues from foreign investors -> opposition in congress for that and other reasons - led to civil war 1891 -> strong presidency no longer; instead, parliamentary dominance -> parliamentary era 1891-1925 - era marked by political corruption and growth of 2 parties (democrat party - roots among artisans and urban workers - and radical party - represented urban middle sectors and provincial elites) -> 1920s: middle and working class powerful enough to elect president - alessandri -> double military coup led to unstable governments until 1932 (first in 1924 which installed alessandri and then again later that year?) -> longest government: ibanez -> 1964 frei government -> 1970 allende (a marxist - lots of controversy regarding cold war geopolitics, ripple effect, installation of socialist gov through free and fair election, u.s. economic interests -> military coup 1973 overthrows allende -> military government led by PINOCHET took over country (he and his junta) -> in 1988, in response to international pressure to liberalize, pinochet risked national plebiscite -> opposition united and mounted highly effective campaign, pinochet accepts loss -> leads to 1989 election, won by christian democrat patricio aylwin (communist party dissolves into bitter divisions) -> aylwin is commited to restoration of democratic institutions, investigation of human rights abuses and technocratic cabinet -> efforts to repeal pinochet legacy in chile through series of constitutional reforms - in 2005, sought to reduce primacy of executive branch and bolster democratic institutions by reducing presidential terms from 6 to 4 years -> moved away from polarization

phew.

good evening.

2011-07-10T21:11:00.000-07:00

I stumbled upon a random blog today. I have absolutely no idea who the writer is, but I felt like reposting something that she wrote, which I found rather simple, challenging, refreshing, and kind of inspiring.

This summer is about:

mending relationships
forming new friendships
having new revelations
making room for God to move

I realized today that I think too much without God in mind. Once I remind myself of who he is and the purpose of why I am here, things settle into place (a little) bit easier.

It is extremely emotionally tiring trying to be wise on your own (from here)

Nothing fancy or extravagant... just some truthful words and prayer requests (what she calls "goals") from an ordinary person that I think I can really relate to. I'm challenged to understand what it takes to make room for God to move in my life, a prayer request that speaks volumes to me in my current stage of life as I reflect on how I run my daily errands, see professors, study for tests, plan my future, and sit around watching Desperate Housewives with my boyfriend (it's a great show, you know!) everyday. Things can get so routine when the only clear path before me is the one that leads to a promising career. As each new day awaits, I might grow really excited at the thought of trying a new recipe or grow really weary at what the next 3+ years of my life are going to look like. But regardless of all these distractions that constantly, CONSTANTLY barrage me, how can I relentlessly make room for God to move in my life and lay off the steering wheel for a while?

Lastly, I am convicted by that last thought: It is extremely tiring trying to be wise on your own.
How TRUE is that?!

Anyway, I am off to establish some goals of my own and then probably cuddle with my puppers.

(See? She likes studying with me!)

Oh, one last thought! I also realize that Molly is truly a great companion to me (as depicted in the photo above). She's just so sweet in every respect and follows me everywhere. I know, I'm swooning over my own dog. Ok goodnight!

sad but true

2011-07-05T23:39:00.000-07:00

As of this summer, my life - until the peak of fall/early winter - WILL undoubtedly be police-patrolled by this terribly annoying organization called the LSAC. I know it happens to all of us prospective J.D students, but it's such a grim-looking next couple of months. Gotta try and stay positive with all this law school admission preparation. This is so not the business....

Hmmmm..... maybe I should resort to retail therapy for each time that I chug through what seems like an initially insurmountable hurdle (i.e. the lsat, getting rec letters, piling on some additional activity/job opportunity that is a resume filler).... i mean, I ought to have some some cute little incentive to get through these next few months, right?

Anyway, just a rambling thought on a late Tuesday night. As for another random thought, Chris' ambition is rather inspiring to me. Today, he wrote a list of "GOALS" that he wanted to accomplish, which I think is so incredibly cool and admirable. I admire that kind of ambition and drive, where people realize that life isn't just handed to them on a silver platter, but that hard work is necessary. Sometimes (okay, a lot of the time), I just sink in my big pile of laziness and self-pity, too self-absorbed in my fake misery to make explicit goals for myself.

haha okay. i am thinking it's time for bed! :D

a few weekend snapshots

2011-07-04T22:55:00.000-07:00

2011-06-30T09:31:00.001-07:00

Ok this is suppppper prideful, but it feels nice to say that I've graduated with cum laude Latin honors. Not that it really matters... because it's not like it's magna or summa cum laude. But still.

Excited for the weekennnnnnnnnnnd!